I'm Fat

[Thumpin]

Time to try some new material...

You guys are so fat that Moby Dick wants to hang out with you at the bar when he's trying to pick-up chicks so that he looks like the skinny one.

You guys are so fat that you put "All You Can Eat" buffets out of business.

You guys are so fat that Weight Watchers wants to use you as the "before" picture for an entire village.

You guys are so fat that it took 2 women to give birth to you.

You so fat you got more chins than a chinese phone book.
You so fat not even Dora can explore you
You so fat, when you sh1t, it looks like two pigs fighting over a milk dud.

[19nate79]

His arms must have been huge after that week!

i picture him using something like this

http://thechive.files.wordpress.com/...pg?w=499&h=602

[19nate79]

You so fat you got more chins than a chinese phone book.
You so fat not even Dora can explore you
You so fat, when you sh1t, it looks like two pigs fighting over a milk dud.

don't forget the putting on the belt with a boomerang one
or stepping on a quarter and squeezing a quarter out of washington's nose
sitting on the rainbow and making skittles
jumped up in the air and got stuck

[Tallica1981]

you guys are noobs at the fat snaps.

You're so fat you got a run in your blue jeans
You're like the bermuda triangle. When kids run around you, they get lost.
You're so fat, when you step on the scale it reads "to be continued..."
You're so fat, when you step on the scale it says "**** it, they don't pay me enough for this ****!"
You're so fat, you iron your clothes in the drive way
You're so fat, cars run out of gas trying to pass your ass
You're so fat, when you wear a rain coat, kids try to ride you.

[seansloan]

Was the binge drinking Hershey's syrup?

[Tallica1981]

Was the binge drinking Hershey's syrup?

BOOM!

Goldschlager, Jagermeister, and Private Stock.

After the ex left, I used to drink a fifth of Private Stock and a fifth of Goldschlager in one night at times. After that I ate everything I could find until i passed out. That was a rough few years. Usually drank 1 bottle a day or so.

[Onion]

I can see the Private Stock, but who the hell drinks Goldschlager, let alone a bottle of it?

[spasgur]

Tallica, if you are motivated, and it sounds like you are, check out a movie called Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead. If you don't have a way to get it, let me know and I'll put it in a folder I can share with you so you can download it directly.

Besides being educational, it's very motivating, actually entertaining, and quite moving.

Just watched the movie. It's on youtube as well, right here:



I think the diet looks very interesting. Of course like all diets it requires a good amount of self discipline, but the effects of it seems quite staggering. The cost of it is somewhat high, though, with $420 per month that is a good size of money on top of mortgage, internet, food and stuff for the kids etc. I doubt that a lot of people will have the will to both go through with the diet for a long period of time but also spend the needed money. For you Americans it's still cheaper than surgery though.

[Onion]

If you wanna watch an eye-opening doc about what you shouldn't eat, watch Forks Over Knives.
Not just about weight, but about avoiding disease. Very interesting stuff.

[just Brian]

Best of luck to you. Are you going to photo document your lap band progress? You should take a photo each day, same place, same pose, same clothes and after ~700 days you can show us a la' time-lapse slide show. And have your kid(s) in the picture...watch you shrink and watch them grow.